Monday, July 19, 2010
Too many friggin choices when it comes to babies!It used to me "this is the way it is" and though I don't fully believe that mindset (because I believe we should grow and learn and not have to do something "just because.") it does however seem easier.
There's too much to consider. Natural birth or Epidural. Thankfully that was taken care of for me since I have to have another C-Section. And besides, damnit, medicine has improved, why not take advantage?! Give me the epidural!
Then theres the whole disposable vs cloth diaper debate. And sure the cloth diaper has come a long way since my mom had all 8 of us in cloth diapers. Pins and soggy butts, and all sort of yuckiness has been replaced with built in covers and snaps. But I already have 2 kids and I can hardly keep up with the laundry I have now- so I could see how they might save you money if you just had 1 child and you both worked- and I don't think it's that much better for the enviroment- sorry I don't. I mean there's the water, the energy, the heat to discenfent, the soap that goes into the Earth. But it's easier to turn the washer on and not think about that than to hold a dirty plastic diaper in your hand and throw it away. And besides, like I said, I already have 2 kids and am the 2nd oldest of 8- I know the ammount of laundry that needs to be done, and I know all too well about those nights when everything is dirty and you don't have a diaper left and oh boy! It's shit fest time! Which is faster and easier- running to the store for a pack of diapers, or washing a load?
If memory serves me correctly I think my mom used a dish towel once in that instance.
And I'm not oen to do something just because its easier- but geez, I've got 2 kids already and whatever I can do to not make me as stressed and wired I'm gonna friggin do it.
And then there's the choice between being on a schedule vs letting the baby determine his/her schedule.
Ok- so that one is a no brainer to me. This baby is coming into our family, and though changes should be made I am not going to bend over backwards to give you what you want and inturn seperate my kids from the family dynamic. That's why I dont' cook them seperate meals. You eat what I make or you starve. Rar.
But here's the dilemma- I'm going to try and breastfeed, again. And I wish, oh I wish, I could find a lactation specialist/breast feeding teacher that felt the way I do about feeding schedules. I don't want to be told I have to go to my baby whenever they cry. I don't want to be told I can't breastfeed and be on a schedule. I dont' want to be told that they'll sleep through the night when "they're" ready.
I had my other 2 sleeping through the night at 3 damn months and I'm proud of that. I don't give a crap about being a mommy martyr- I dont' need to tell people "oh man the baby kept me up all night" so people will know how hard I have it. I've got 2 toddlers and a 3rd one on the way I have nothing to prove. I work hard- I don't need anyone's approval. So no, I don't want to be told I can't be on a schedule. I'm tired damnit and the best thing you can give your kids is a healthy and happy parent- and if I haven't gotten any sleep I am nowhere near a healthy happy parent. Damnit. Rar.
And ok, it seems I've made up my mind about all of this... but I really haven't. Then again once this baby pops out I'll know what to do and have confidence in that.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
According to the TV my life sucksIf sitcoms were at all true then I was living my life wrong while growing up. I mean on sitcoms kids are embarrassed by their parents and can't wait to get out of the house. Me? I was the big dork who would've rather stayed home with her family than go out.
Ok, it's not like anyone ever asked me to go hang out at the local pizza shop or something- but if they had I would've wanted to just stay home. My family is much more fun than a a bunch of kids who complain about their families. Ok, I know in order to be cool you need to have had a terrible home life. Sorry. I like to think of the bad times as a growin experience and even if my parents and I were fighting I still had my siblings and my room. Or more likely I hd a bed as I shared a room with 2 of my sisters.
I guess it's because there were 8 of us- we had built in friendships and a community. I never understood "small" families- you know the ones with only 3 or 4 kids. It seems to be too seperate. But I grew up with 5 sisters and 2 brothers- so I should just shut up.
It's just an observation.
Wednesday, July 07, 2010
*blink* wait... I have faults?!As most people who know me would tell you- I am (way too) opinionated.
It's not that I think I'm better than others- not at all (ok some people I know I'm better than- you know like Hitler)- it's just I have high standards and expect the people I love to have high standards as well. Not ncessarily the same- but it infuriates me when people just settle. People who settle I think don't have much self esteem.
Let's take sex for example. I expect myself and those I love not to be stupid when it comes to sex. Pretty simple you would think. But there are people in the world who think "I used protection! I won't get pregnant!" Uhhh- stupid! I think if you're going to take that step to have sex with someone you should understand the consequences.
If only it were that easy.
And speaking of someones- that's another thing. Settling for a partner. Why would you just settle? Why tell yourself you can't get better? Come on now that's just sad.
Of course then there are those who like to think they'll be able to force their partner into changing into what they want. Yes, everyone changes- but there's a huge difference between growing together and screeching like a harpy when your partner has a different view from you. I knew I was dating a Conservative and would marry one and I think we work because the other isn't secretly hoping the other will change.
So your partner likes cats and you like dogs- it's ok! You lik vanilla icecream with sprinkles and they like chocolate with everything under the sun in it- it's ok!
And why the fuck would you stay with someone who's abusive? And abusive can be abusing drugs, you, themselves, etc. Sometimes the best thing to do for someone like that is not giving them yet another chance but a firm kick in the ass.
Trust me- I can go from 0 to Bitch in no time and I'm still learning not to take the little things as big things. But I expect my husband not to be a douche.
Let's move on to plastic surgery. Do you honestly think your self doubts will go away with each cut? Seriously?
Now I understand medical reason for plastic surgery. You know like being dunked in acid and your face fell off. Or you have chronic back pain and need to reduce your boobs.
But scared of a wrinkle or you think your boobs need to be bigger to be satisfied and feel good about yourself. That's sad.
Of course I'm not completely happy with my body- who is? But learning to be ok and seeing the beauty in yourself is so much better than some quick fix that won't really fix anything.
I could go on and on and on and... well you get the point.
The problem is that I'm way too vocal about all this. No one really has to guess my opinion about things. Yes, I suppose I should let people live their own lives- make their own mistakes. But that's the thing, I love my friends and family too much to see them hurt.
But I don't rush to my kids with they fall down- I let them get back up. I suppose it's the same thing.
Thursday, July 01, 2010
My crazy parents.I was driving home from I don't remember where the other day and Whitney Houston's "The Greatest Love of All" song came on- and memories of crazy things my parents told me started flooding in.
So 22 or so years later did I turn the station when that song came on? Pfft! I'm a rebel! I don't conform to the latest fashion trends and I listen to The Greatest Love of All! That's right- I'm hardcore.
We celebrated All Saints Day (which is the day after- November 1st). We all dressed up like our favorite saint, stayed home, had some candy and watched The Secret Garden. Oh, of course when they did that dance around the fire in that movie we had to close our eyes.
Not that my parents were always this crazy. It was my mom that first introduced me to Harry Potter (and Stephen who forced me to read it). And it's my mom who taught me how to not conform and do something just because someone else is doing it. They taught me to stand up for myself.
They, like every other parent, had moments of complete crazy.